Going With the Flow, or Sleepwalking Through Life?
How often have you heard it? I’m just going with the flow. What does it mean to you?
Seriously, give it some thought.
For many, going with the flow means no struggle and acceptance of how the world is presenting itself. It implies either a lack of action or, for some, strategic action. Going with the flow, in this context, feels like the martial art, Aikido, where an opposing attack is absorbed and not resisted.
For others, especially when they are experiencing stress, a desire to go with the flow means giving up. In spiritual circles, after all, we are told that God, Source, Love, or Light is in charge anyway, and all we have to do is surrender and let that larger force take us downstream. In this case, going with the flow is more like an escape.
I have heard people declare that they are going with the flow as they abdicate responsibility, as they shrug and remove themselves from what may seem like a battle. They give up on what they want in the face of opposing forces. I’ve seen this mostly in classrooms where teachers give up trying to maintain order or reach difficult students.
It seems that trying to “go with the flow” can sometimes mean checking out and sleepwalking through life.
Down by the river, I watch leaves going with the flow. The leaves have no volition in this process. If the river delivers them into an eddy, that’s where they stay stuck. If the river bangs them up against a rock, they endure that and move on to the next adventure the river has to offer them. Some get cast up on the muddy bank and never resume their flow. Others get picked up by children and torn to bits.
If there is a flow in the Universe and if we are in that flow, what is the best way to be within that flow? It would be problematic to give up on our own desires and preferences and surrender to whatever the flow offers up. Even if we believe in the benevolence of the river, even if we believe in the goodness of life, and that life would never deliver us somewhere where we couldn’t thrive, the abandonment of any hope, desire, dream, or preference leaves scars in our psyches.
Like it or not, humans are desirous beings. We don’t have to be driven by our desires, but we have to acknowledge that we have them. And when we give up on one, it causes us pain. If we are savvy, we can deal with the pain, release the desire, and move on without negative consequence. But so often, we give up on ourselves as a reaction. We don’t deal with the pain which gets stored in our consciousness and creates a disturbance we hold in our energy field.
So, sometimes, going with the flow creates disharmonious places that can impact our health, our relationships, and our well-being.
How can we go with the flow and maintain our well-being?
We can stay alert and aware. I’m not talking about the state of adrenaline-soaked alarm many of us live in every day. I’m talking about being observant and curious, managing our reactions so that we can continue to use our minds to assess our situations.
This is about being present. Taking in one moment at a time. Recognizing both the potential triggers that may catapult us into reactivity, and the glimmers that offer us a cubic centimeter of chance to engage fully and thrive. In this way, we avoid using “going with the flow” as a way to sleepwalk through life.
As leaves, we cannot change the river all at once. What we can do is appreciate the ride. We can stay in appreciation if we take care of ourselves, ask for what we want, effectively deal with our disappointments, and stay awake, curious, and in wonder.